How did you start camming and what was the process of becoming a cam girl?
I had recently turned 18 and was desperate for money. I saw an ad online and applied. Didn’t really think much of it in the beginning. I was naïve. They get young girls in and tell them that they can take off as much as they feel comfortable with. The reality is – if you want to be making money in this line of business, you have to get naked. Yes, there are few people out there, that get sexual gratification from ‘money sluts’ but that’s very rare and most of the time, you have to be camming for decades to get to that point.
The process was really straightforward. I went into the office one day after school (I was still in college), they explained to me what the job would “entitle”, took a photocopy of my ID and also a headshot holding an application number. This was all done to verify my identity so that my profile could be set up.
Within a week I was already camming full-time.
I got my pay in an envelope weekly after my studio had taken their cut. If I remember correctly, they were taking 60%. I stayed for about 6 months but ended up leaving to make far less money as a waitress, but at least I could keep my clothes on.
Did your friends and family know about your new job?
I never told anyone, what I was doing. I told my parents and friends that I was working at a hotel that had night shifts. The studio was located near a hotel, so sometimes my dad would even drop me off thinking that I worked at that specific hotel.
They still don’t know. I’ve never told anyone.
What was your experience like?
It was weird. I was still a virgin when I started camming. I had very little sexual experience – at that point, I knew what a penis was, but I didn’t really know what to do with one. In college, I was a shy girl, always in my own world. Learning dirty talk for specific clientele was hard, half of the things I had to say out loud I was uncomfortable with even thinking about let alone describing explicitly exactly how I’d do it to someone else.
At first, because I was new, it was really easy to make money. I remember I once had a ‘private session’ with a guy and we played a stripping game. He stayed on with me for 45 min or so and all I took off was my bra. That was my first private session.
Later on, I don’t know… It wasn’t as big of a deal any more getting naked, so I would be naked and fully ‘going at it’ probably like 5 mins in.
Shows were very popular. If you could squirt as a girl, you’d do very well. Also, fetish shows… anything from showing your feet, to peeing, to just showing yourself shower, toy play, BDSM etc. You would schedule a show a day or two prior and people could just pop in and out. You got less money per viewer than private shows, but because multiple people were watching, at the end of the show you might have made more money than just doing a private show for the same amount of time.
Did you ever do any shows?
Yes, you have to. Shows were an easy way to get lots of reviews. The more reviews a girl has the more businesses she’ll most likely get.
I did BDSM dominatrix shows. Looking back, it was very irresponsible because I had had no BDSM training so really, I could have put people in danger. I did feet shows and shower shows.
At the time my unique selling point was that I wasn’t shaving down there so I’d do close up shows of just my pussy. So, I had the face of basically a child and a bush of an 80s woman – that made me unique. I did a lot of schoolgirl role play. Looking back at it, some of it was really fucked up. I’d be asked to look, dress and act a lot younger. I guess it’s better these predators prayed on me than someone actually underage.
Sometimes I’d go on another girl’s profile for a girl-to-girl show. It’s tricky then because you’ve got to share your income in half.
Any bad experiences?
Plenty. I don’t even know where to start listing them.
Some people would be rude or leave bad reviews out of spite. Others just expected ‘previews’ for free.
You’re not a human; you’re an object. So, they treat you like an object. It’s degrading. My self-worth plummeted. Sex became dirty. It took me a while to get over it and become sexually active without suspecting that my partner just wanted to take advantage of me.
Years later one of my past “clients” found me on Facebook. That scared me. Had to block them. I was lucky they were harmless. Other girls might not have it as easy. What if they had footage of me? They could have blasted that all over social media. It’s not like that has never happened in the past.
Do you regret it?
Nothing to regret, it is what it is. I’m not that person anymore, and I would never do it now. It’s not about being ashamed; it might have been when I was 18, but not anymore.
Now I am a cheerleader of women that are open about their work. As long as they are safe, of course. And enjoy it.
I worry someone recorder my private sessions. I don’t think much legally would protect me from having explicit videos of me blasted across the internet. I think only recently some steps have been made to protect people against revenge porn.
Did you ever cross the line?
I did some client’s I started keeping in touch outside work. It’s really dangerous because what kind of genuine friendship can come from that? I never fall in love or anything like that, if that’s what you mean.
One of the biggest mistakes I made was sharing my real name with some people. Not protecting my identity. It’s bad enough that my face has to be all over it – it was a policy for the site that I worked on, they required you to have your face in the photos, sometimes even close-ups.
Was it all bad?
No. I made some friends through work, and I learned a lot from more ‘seasoned’ girls. We were a diverse group of girls at the studio. Some were my age, others were older and with children. Some were single, and some were married. For the most part, we’d chill in the common area during our breaks and just chat, no one ever really spoke about what they did in their sessions, except to share a few tips or to warn about some creeps user name.
I met some girls that really love camming, they love the experience and get a thrill of it. Those girls also did a lot better and were really popular. I remember one of the girls was a few years older and had been with the studio for years. She worked as a nanny for some foreign diplomat family, she didn’t need the money per se she just enjoyed it. I think she was also kind of used to that lavish lifestyle that comes with a 5-star camming reputation – she’d get gifts sent and was making more money than she knew what to do with. I think soon after I left, she took camming private and started her own studio.
That’s something I noticed a lot. The more popular girls would leave the studio to Start their own studios. Most claimed they were sick of working for someone else, others wanted a more female-friendly studio environment (our studio was run by a man).
Camming is consensual, and the girls set their own limits. I did soft BDSM, so that was clear on my profile. I never got clients expecting hard BDSM because most likely my profile wouldn’t come up for them. It’s kind of like Google in that a specific client can search for particular criteria – let’s say they like blondes, they can tailor their search and only view blonde girls – same with a lot more hardcore stuff.
The web platform we used is pretty good at protecting girls, not perfect but alright. If you complied with their rules, they were okay at protecting you.
Have you ever thought of going back to camming?
After I finished my A-levels, I was tempted. I was a couple months into uni, had moved away from my parents and was really struggling financially. Waitressing wasn’t cutting it anymore as I had to cut down my hours loads. I knew if I went back to my studio, they’d let me work remotely or I could have just done it privately. I toyed with the idea for a few times but never went back to it.
When my daughter was born, I was also considering it again. I had her too young when I had her, and I wasn’t financially prepared. In some ways, it’s really easy money, so it’s tempting but in other ways is such a hard way of living. You never know what your paycheck is going to be, it can feel degrading, and you have to be prepared to push boundaries. Now that I have a daughter I have much more to lose so I knew I couldn’t go back. Instead, I finished school remotely, worked full time and sometimes more than that just to afford childcare.
I think parts of me if I were in a different situation, would like to go back. I’m now a lot more comfortable in my own body and have more sexual experience so I think I would enjoy it more.